Me Log: Laina and Shoe Shopping

25 days Out from Mad Wizard Isle. A port in Fejounaise

Laina is the new lass aboard the Maelstrom. She is elf lady and she has given me bunk mate Murgosis no end of disagreement since she showed her pointed face on Mad Wizard Isle. Murgosis is a feared of elves as he says they are like to lay eggs in our belly's and what all. I been watchin' Laina right close though and I has yet to see her birthin' probiscus that Murgosis is so on about it. In anywise Laina done me a right favor today when she squired me about this here elven isle in search of garments, frippery and drapery. Whilst I had been about shiftin' off me mortal coil again and again these last few weeks me clothes both great and small and had been shiftin' as well. In fact they shifted themselves into holes and powder. For the last two weeks I been tired in the orphans cast offs and none to happy on it.

In any event, once we made port I had me two grand goals; new togs and at least twenty hefty tankards. Seein' as how Laina claimed to be from here round abouts, I asked her if'n she'ld show me the lay of the land. Well when I threw my hook for sardines I hooked me a whale. Laina first led me to her "leetle pla'ce" as she called it. Her "chat tow" as she named it, were full the size of the Maelstrom beam to beam and stem to stern. I could barely behold the lot of it ganding about from the street as I was. She dragged me within and showed me her "bood ware" or some such. She must have near to two hundred pairs of shoes enough to shod a cavalry squadron horse and man. Not that they'ld wear the collection of straps and spikes Laina terms shoes.

Next the pointed ear minx open a room filled to burstin' with naught but frocks. She had ball gowns, travellin' frocks, doublets n' hose and these wee tiny little scruffs of cloth that she told me were Faerie Court Dress. The biggest bit o' which would ne'er have covered the crow's nest on me picture of the Bloody Cutlass. I took one look at what was left of me toggs and turned a scarlet near the color of me old coat. Laina waved her hands in the air and told me to think not of it. She grabbed the valise she done come for and near to ran me out out of her house. For the next six hours she dragged me round to "thee best at-tyre-mont". Turns out that "At-tyre-mont" means a Man o' War's worth of drapers and cutters. Still though I ain't never been so fine kitted out, e'en if I did lay out near a thousand gold wheels.

For afters I led Laina down to the wharfs for the quaffin' and the singin'. Seems as if Laina ne'er been in sailor's stew afore so this was a rare treat for her. Aye, she allowed as she had never "smelt soooch feelth" or some'at but she seemed to enjoy the quaffin' onced she'ld got the hang of bendin' an elbow. I reckon she was a fibbin a might about not havin' been in the wharf taverns though, seein' as the publican knew her by name and asked after missin' brother. By the time I'ld crossed the floor she had two rough coves, one to each arm, to squire through the evenin'. They were gabbin' like old mates the pair of them with grins on their gobs as kids with their first candy. 'Course tehm poor sods didna' see the grin ol' Laina were wearin' methinks. Sure and there's a lion missing his smiler somewhere, thinks I. Those coves have no idea what they are in for.

I was sad that I didna' see Murgosis Meri-Amen-Bull-Ra III about, but I reckon it were on account of all the "pointy eared vile slaves"as he calls 'em. Dagon was there though and the new feller what was on Zhaki's barque. He's a right kind a feller, bright eye and all, and a fine smile. Methinks he'll fit right in among us. We rolled our elbows a few times and Dagon allowed as how I was right about Murgosis. He were mopin' 'pon the Maelstrom a meditatin' or some such. He also let on that me horn-head-luv was none to pleased with me goin' ashore. Well how was I to know that says I, "He only had to ask me and I woulda' stayed to ship with him." 'Course I did leave the ship two hours afore the sun rose and waited on the docks till Laina rose her own self and came down the plank. What can I say, I love me a sunrise.